Thursday, December 23, 2004

Nightmares and Christmas carols

I am sitting in an open space inside a big mansion. In front of me, there is a green house. I see an oft-remembered love of long past playing tag with my younger brother. They run through the green house towards the left and disappear.
I am happy for some odd reason. My deceased grandmother and aunt are sitting beside me, one on each side, holding my hands. I realize I am in heaven.
Behind the green house is a giant swimming pool, overlooked by an all-glass building, on top of which the sun shines in a soft afternoon glow.
My brother is on the top of the building. He moves to the side. She comes running from behind him, doesn't stop, and dives into the pool with the elegance of an olympic diver, somersaulting, twisting, bending and finally hitting the water in a small splash.
My grandmother smiles.
I wake up with a smile on my face. With a start like this, my day is bound to be good. Its still not time, and my body is aching for more sleep. I turn over and close my eyes.
This time, I am in Pakistan, travelling in a car. The road looks like the GT road, with huge power lines running on the left, tower after tower, as I stare out the window.
I see two girls and two boys, in school uniforms, the grey drabs of Kurta and white shalwars, with shoulder bags on the back standing on top of one of the powerline metallic structures.
Suddenly, they jump.
I shout for the car to stop. By the time I get there, they have burned up in the mesh of wires, with the shoulder bags still on their backs.
I cry in my sleep, and wake up contemplating suicide. Even my dreams reek of symbolism.
---
I am shit tired of hearing Christmas carols. Everywhere I go, its about christmas. Well, atleast the musicians didn't mind being christians, and forgot about the politically correct 'Happy holidays'. God is in the details.
I didn't celebrate eid, and sure as hell won't be celebrating christmas. Its all a big farce for materialism. People reduced to petty emotionalism by the media. What a happy world we live in.
But, being the hypocrite that I am, I did give one christmas gift, to my most beautiful female colleague, (who graces this place with her one-liners from time to time). And guess what the gift was? An unabridged evening with Murli Zee, raw as sushi, albeit vegetarian.
By new year's eve, she will have fallen in love with me, inspite of her boyfriend, if not, because of him.
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Dear Rahul,
You have caught me at a bad time, but what the hell. I'll bitch to anyone who will read. Beam me up, Scotty!